Reflections

This semester I am taking another course at Calvin College. Education 510 Advanced Foundations in Education is its name and it is online. As part of that I am required to think about certain topics or reading along the way. I am sharing them here. They will be posted under the tag reflection, as that is the professors word for the assignment, the tag learning as all of my learning is posted under this, and EDUC510 because there are three other assignments that will posted here as well. The professors question or prompts will be in italics, and my answers in regular text.

To Know As We Are Known: Chapters 1-4

Learning Log 1 

To Know As We Are Known: Chapters 1-4

Parker J. Palmer

Summary

Palmer is saying that education is about discovering the truth. Truth is only discovered through love. There must be equal parts love for the subject, yourself and others walking with you on the path of discovery. If you deny any one of these their role in the process you will not arrive at truth.

Important Ideas

  • Love is essential to knowing truth.
  • We the observer are essential to knowing truth.
  • Interacting with the subject is essential to knowing truth.
  • The idea of learning reflecting a monastic culture.

Question

How do we gather up the courage and support to teach in a way that build a community of learners in the face of high stakes tests, the tyranny of results right now and a world that is doing all it can to tear apart community?

Quotes

  1. But what scholars now say -- and what good teachers have always known -- is the real learning does not happen until students are brought into relationship with the teacher, with each other, and with the subject. pg xvi
  2. The deepest wellspring of our desire to know is the passion to recreate the organic community in which the world was first created. pg 8
  3. A knowledge that springs from love may require us to change, even sacrifice, for the sake of what we know. It is easy to be curious and controlling. It is difficult to love. pg 9
  4. Truthful knowing weds the knower and the known; even in separation, the two become part of each other's life and fate. pg 31
  5. Reality's ultimate structure is that of an organic, interrelated, mutually responsive community of being. pg 53

Reflection

I have said before in the is that I love Parker Palmer and this book. What I loved most about it was that is so well described what I felt like I was doing at camp when I was younger and counseling kids. Bringing them all around the woods with no particular agenda other than to look at what God had given us. It was wonderful and still to this day I love bringing cabins around (I am a director in the summer). I love teaching counselors how to live in the world that brings kids to God's love and God's kingdom. He gave me the strength to say that this was how to teach as well and I like to think I have not turned back. Giving in to the pressures that would make us just teach the facts is really easy. It is also something that keeps your job safe. I have never seen someone questioned who was telling kids the way it is. That is not the way I want to do it though. I want them to see it and live it and experience it. I want them to know each other and getting them to care about what is going on in each others lives because they will learn physics better does not fly with most kids in a highly motivated school. There is not any doubt in my mind about its effectiveness, except while I am doing it. There is so little in immediate results and it seems like you are never going to get anywhere. It seems like you are stalled because something important has not been achieved. But then there is a day when the right mood and the right questions and the right time all intersect. Those time can only happen when you are constantly looking for them, but when they do happen you learn more in one day than some people do in a semester. You know what has happened and how the community of the learners (yourself included) have been ushered into a new relationship with the subject. I love the vision be being wed to the subject. It totally describes what I am after. When a kids asks about the physics of something that happened at home or on the football field or the golf course. Then you have them. When you get a text message in the middle of the summer with a question or just a comment. They are in relationship with the subject.

Learning Logs

You will start to see learning logs here. I took a class this past semester and these were the assignments every week. I am cleaning them up a little and putting them out there for comment, input, and because I am surprised at how many people were interested in my pedagogical autobiography. I got several personal emails along with comments on the entries. Thanks for your interest and I hope you learn something for these observations. One of the real strengths of my class was the reading material. There were a lot of pages of reading, but it was great stuff. Here is the format you will see in each log.

Summary

A couple of sentances sumarizing your view of the work.

Important Ideas

  • several simple statements getting at the important ideas of the text.
Question

Our big question that we would like to discuss with the author if we had the chance.

Quotes

    1. Our favorite quotes from the book or article.

    Reflection

    Ten minutes of free flowing thought trying to imagine the conversation surrounding the question you would ask the author. I admit I am cleaning this up a little for the web. Our professor was fine with misspellings and bad grammar. She wanted raw thought. Frequently that is what you get from me, but I might run the spell check.

    Standards

    I read two articles in the last 24 hours taking very strong stand against national education standards. What make them interesting is that they offer essentially the same argument from wildly different world views. I love the common argument.

    Both argue that a child is a unique individual, and that standards, national standards no less, will make for almost no chance that a child's truth discovery in life will intersect at all with what they do in school. This will be a colossal waste of their time and our money as a society. No less my time as an educator.

    I spent a lifetime hearing Proverbs 22:6, "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." and thinking I and my parents knew where God wanted me to go. It wan not until my faith matured that I realized that God had a plan for me. Training a child has little to do with where I think the child should go. It has everything to do with what God has built for that child to do. My job as an physics teacher is to put as much physics stuff around the learners so that the parts of each student that need to know physics interact with the truth of physics. That way God will reveal the way each learner in the class (including me) should go. 

    From a Christian perspective, God tells us that we are each unique and have a gift to use in the Kingdom of God. That Kingdom is now and real. Standards reduce the chance that a learner will interact with a subject on any level but fact. From a humanistic perspective truth is built and sought by the learner. Standards eliminate any possibility that learners will find anything but the most watered down trivialized truths of the subject that has been standardized. This does not bring out their passions, turns them off to school (and may be learning along with it) and does not make them who they are suposed to be.

    Acorns

    Yesterday Lydia truly helped with the food preparation. Today we are having people over celebrating the finalization of Asha'a adoption. After grandma melted the white chocolate in a double boiler Lydia and grandpa would dip grapes in the chocolate and then the chocolate into some chopped peanuts. This makes little edible acorns. Yummy and fun. I am not sure how that chocolate got around Lydia's mouth. 

    This Is The Day

    I led this chapel, "This Is The Day" on December 7, 2009 at HCHS. The insight into the passage and the repeat after me format is a complete rip off from a friend who spoke this summer at Camp Roger. The words are from my students, anonymously. I chickened out in front of the audience and said purity instead of virginity.

    Psalm 118 (NIV)

     1 Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; 
           his love endures forever.

     2 Let Israel say: 
           "His love endures forever."

     3 Let the house of Aaron say: 
           "His love endures forever."

     4 Let those who fear the LORD say: 
           "His love endures forever."

     5 In my anguish I cried to the LORD, 
           and he answered by setting me free.

     6 The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. 
           What can man do to me?

     7 The LORD is with me; he is my helper. 
           I will look in triumph on my enemies.

     8 It is better to take refuge in the LORD 
           than to trust in man.

     9 It is better to take refuge in the LORD 
           than to trust in princes.

     10 All the nations surrounded me, 
           but in the name of the LORD I cut them off.

     11 They surrounded me on every side, 
           but in the name of the LORD I cut them off.

     12 They swarmed around me like bees, 
           but they died out as quickly as burning thorns; 
           in the name of the LORD I cut them off.

     13 I was pushed back and about to fall, 
           but the LORD helped me.

     14 The LORD is my strength and my song; 
           he has become my salvation.

     15 Shouts of joy and victory 
           resound in the tents of the righteous: 
           "The LORD's right hand has done mighty things!

     16 The LORD's right hand is lifted high; 
           the LORD's right hand has done mighty things!"

     17 I will not die but live, 
           and will proclaim what the LORD has done.

     18 The LORD has chastened me severely, 
           but he has not given me over to death.

     19 Open for me the gates of righteousness; 
           I will enter and give thanks to the LORD.

     20 This is the gate of the LORD 
           through which the righteous may enter.

     21 I will give you thanks, for you answered me; 
           you have become my salvation.

     22 The stone the builders rejected 
           has become the capstone;

     23 the LORD has done this, 
           and it is marvelous in our eyes.

     24 This is the day the LORD has made; 
           let us rejoice and be glad in it.

     25 O LORD, save us; 
           O LORD, grant us success.

     26 Blessed is he who comes in the name of the LORD. 
           From the house of the LORD we bless you.

     27 The LORD is God, 
           and he has made his light shine upon us. 
           With boughs in hand, join in the festal procession 
           up to the horns of the altar.

     28 You are my God, and I will give you thanks; 
           you are my God, and I will exalt you.

     29 Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; 
           his love endures forever.

    Repeat After Me

    I need your help with chapel today. I need you all to finish this line when I start it.

    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.
    [practice until they get it right]

    The Good

    You have probably heard this phrase a hundreds times. On Sunday in church, in chapel right here. In class or devotions somewhere. I am sure that many of us sang the song in battle of who could be louder with the other half of the room in Sunday school. And sometimes it is so easy to say:
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Just being able to be with friends- they can turn my whole day around and make it so much better- they can make me laugh at anytime.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    The day when we were at regional for MIFA One-Act and they announced that Holland Christian had won the competition. All of the excitement and tears of joy we all shared is something that will bring me joy for my entire life. When I see others around me succeed in theater. We work together and perform together as a family - it's an irreplaceable blessing in my life.

    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    When I actually got an A- on a math test. That was one of the best days of my life.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Giving money to the Children of Hope and watching the Children's Choir come to our school to sing. 
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Teachers understanding and flexibility. Seriously.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    When I just figured out that Christmas break is 2 weeks long this year and that I graduate in May and then am forever done with high school... awesome!! 
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Being on the Podium at  the state meet for swimming.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    The day that my now best friend invited me to sit with them at lunch. Those moments have brought me happiness and have helped me through many times. Without them the friendship and who I am today may not be here. 
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    The tug of war battle over the mud pit (biology pond) my freshman year. 
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Someone put this in the wrong place in the form. CAPA.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    These are actual quotes from actual students. I did not make them up, I had them submit them in a Google Form. I would suggest that we are in the season that this phrase was made for. God humbled himself to be a human child and we wait in expectation of the day of his arrival.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    The Bad

    But then this summer a friend pointed out the rest of the Psalm to me. Listen to some of these verses.

     5 In my anguish I cried to the LORD, 
     10 All the nations surrounded me, 
     13 I was pushed back and about to fall, 

    Anguished, surrounded, pushed back, about to fall. None of that sounds good. Some days it is practically impossible to say:
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Watching my friends say snide comments behind each others backs. 
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    When some of my friends were chosen to be part of a team, but I wasn't- at times you can feel very excluded. 
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    When my boyfriend broke up with me. 
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    In my sophomore year I experienced three different and very significant deaths... the worst for me was my grandfather, he was an amazing man and the best grandpa. I will forever miss him... and the tragedies that happened in my sophomore year will always be in my mind. 
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    People lying to me. It is easy to find out that they lie....
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Having to find where you fit in. It is a really hard process. 
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    My grandpa is getting older, and we are really starting to be able to see the effects of his age. It's hard to watch. 
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Injustice from friends or teachers. 
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Watching my parents relationship fall apart.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    When my Dad died.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Hearing that one of my classmates has never had a birthday cake before. I had never thought about being thankful for cake before.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Personal Responsibility

    Listen to one more verse.
     18 The LORD has chastened me severely, 
           but he has not given me over to death. 

    Its even worse! Some of the pain in life we created and need to be corrected. Ouch. The only thing good about the situation is that God did not take our life. Some days it feels like we do not even deserve to say:
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Bad grades.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Getting in a car accident and having to tell your mom (you are screwed).
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Fights with friends.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Losing my virginity.
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    How Can We Keep Saying This?

    Twenty years ago this Christmas week my Grandpa died. Two weeks ago Saturday Bob died. Bob was a good friend, the first time I have lost a good friend to death. In the 20 years between those deaths I have made decisions plenty of times and been thrust into plenty of other situations where it felt impossible to say:
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    But 2000 years ago Jesus said
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    and because of his life and love for me I can muster the strength and courage each day to say
    Me:    This is the day the LORD has made
    You:    let us rejoice and be glad in it.

    Let's Pray

    Blessed are we who come in the name of the LORD. 
           From this house of the LORD we bless you.

    You, LORD are God, 
           and you have made your light shine upon us. 
           With boughs in hand, we join in the festal procession 
           up to the horns of the altar.

    You are our God, and we will give you thanks; 
           you are our God, and we will exalt you.

    We Give thanks to you LORD, for you are good; 
           and your love endures forever.

    Pedagogical Autobiography: Failure

    I try new things. My class is never the same year to year. That is not to say that students would not see pieces that they would recognize. My friend and the camp director that I worked for, who was an assistant principal, told me that the best thing he could have done for education was to throw out all the file cabinets. There are new kids in front of you each year. Listen to them and see where they need to go. 

    This means failure. I have to apologize and give credit for work that did not go the way I had planned. I have to ask kids to finish lessons and labs that are not meeting my goals, simply to see how badly they end so that I know all the improvements that need to be made. I say the wrong thing when answering questions. I make mistakes.

    Luckily for me science is all about making mistakes. And so is good teaching. 

    It is hard to imagine that failure should be a part of what and how we teach. And I am not just saying this in the sort of pithy way that entrepreneurs who have millions of dollars in the bank fail at new ventures, but still have millions of dollars in the bank. Failing at things means three things. You are comfortable with the people and place that you are with. You are reflective about what you have done. You are trying something that you did not know how to do before. 

    Because I am willing to try new things, I think my students are as well. It welcomes them to the club of science where we try things, and sometimes they work and sometimes they do not. By club I mean Frank Smith's idea of club, "all the different groups with which we identify ourselves." (page 10) School as we know it in America does not tolerate failure. Students are in a constant fight with each other for position in class ranking, GPA, grades and test scores. They know that what helps the others in their classes might not help them. To get them to then be willing to try something that they might not suceed at will only happen if they feel like they can recover from what went wrong. I hopefully allow all of this to work together to bring them to a place where trying and failing is comfortable.

    The second thing you need to be to fail well is to be reflective. I will often have students who do not know why they have failed. This is not an easy thing to figure out. You need to be reflective to understand your short comings. Modeling this helps. I can model it both in an experimental way, by looking closely the work they do and reflecting on it with them. I also model it, without trying to, by showing how I recover from my educational experiments. Each of these offers insight to the learners of how the larger world works. 

    Finally, I want my students to try new challenges. I like to challenge their ways of looking at school, learning and the world. I want them to think big thoughts about how to solve the problems in front of them, in their own unique ways. This takes time, real class time, and attention to what is happening. It takes listening without interrupting or even reacting. It also takes some tolerance for students who are not working while others are not even close to done. I am still unsure of what to do with these students. 

    Failing is a big part of trying new things and living in the world. Reacting to it in reflective, positive ways is a life long lesson that I have learned as I watch my students. I am not naturally good at failing, not even remotely. They have taught me much of what I know about it and I will be forever indebted to them for these lessons.


    Pedagogical Autobiography: Future Questions

    As I think about the course that I have just taken, and the impact on my classroom, I have had a number of questions come to mind about my own practice. The process of moving through the autobiography has also inspired a lot of questions about what I do to help and hurt my students progress towards who God wants them to be. In no particular order here are my questions.

    How can I better integrate faith into learning? In an excellent blog post Dan Beerens lists 9 qualities of discipleship. As I looked at this list several of them are sorely missing from my physics classroom. My goal for the year is to integrate each characteristic at least one time into what I am learning with my students. This has proven to be a much harder goal than I thought. This also means that there is a lot left to my work on integrating faith into what I learn. It inspires great questions like: How do I worship in science class? What idolatry will you find as a scientist? How can science build community, or where can we keep it from breaking down community? How can we use science to bring joy and heal brokenness? Palmer says, "Transformed by love we use our minds to recall and recreate the community in which we were created, to know the world in the same spirit in which we are known." (page 16) Becoming disciples of Christ through physics class and through better teaching will move us to know more about who made us, and everything that Gods made for us.

    How does a technology rich environment fit with and change learning? This question is always on my mind as I learn in my own classroom, but also as I am called from time to time to lead the learning of the faculty on the same topic. We all, students and teachers a like, have laptops at my school. How does that change what I do? What needs to be discarded and what needs to be enhanced? Palmer says, "truth seeks us as well." (pg 72) Laptops make this happen at a pace that makes the truth of this statement obvious. How to I harness that power. The laptops also allow us to explore to every end the wonderful ideas that Duckworth speaks of. They are a limitless tool in my limited hands.

    What is a physics teacher's response to wolframalpha? It essentially eliminates the need for all math issues in my class, and If I can get the students to use it, it changes fundamentally what physics I can teach. What physics should be taught if no math is required to know it? What problems can we solve when we do not need to know math but can apply math? How does the experience change? This may seem like a simple question but it is not even remotely easy. I feel like this is a physics teachers Gutenberg press. Using the ideas of Smith, how do I use this tool to, "help" students rather than "teach" students to join the physics club. Certainly some in this club would just outlaw this new tool. Others would embrace it to the disinterest of the problem solvers attracted to the field. How do I find the balance?

    How can I be less helpful? Teachers are too often jumping in to help rather than stepping back to watch and learn what the learners are learning. I do this all the time. Sometimes the best thing is to wait, and I do not wait enough. I want to strive to never ask questions that I know the answer to ahead of time. In "On Listening to What the Children Say" Vivian Gussin Paley listened so well. I want to provide for myself that opportunity more often. How do I find the time and the patience to do that? I want to have the same look when a learner gets an answer right as wrong. I do not what to "fill[ed] in the blanks" myself. (page 360)

    This is of course not all the questions, but the ones that have really driven my reflections this fall. I will try to keep updating with new questions. 

    UPDATE
    Here is an interesting book list to explore some of the ideas we read about together.